My drink and my two-step.

Five dollar bills rolled up into a bra, hugging a toilet and missing an unknown number of hours of the night. No, its not some random story I heard the other day while listening closely to customers conversations. This was my weekend.
Let me begin with the underlying theme of this wild sherade. It was my cousin's 20th brithday on Saturday and the plan was that we would all go out for a good ol' time on the town... also called Hess Village.
The Party was boring basically until my fun-filled self showed up with two bottles of hard liquor and a blown-up poster of Nick Jonas for the birthday gal. I was in some nice sweats, with my hair done to perfection and my make-up looking relatively decent in comparison to normal days. I figure I would start my night off with a nice stiffy. Vodka and coke. Man it went down smoothly. So did the next one. Soon, to my utter surprise I no longer had vodka, so I shifted gears and divuldged into this blue crap that smelt like oranges. I mixed it with orange juice and the cuncoction wasn't half bad. Somewhere in this timeline I changed into my skirt-turned-into-dress outfit.
It was just after that I began to get into a tussle with one of my cousin's friend. Of course when you are drinking, everything is settled with a chug. So to prove that I was indeed the bigger man (as I was drinking along side a man about twice my size), I downed my drink and pounded my fists into the air. Champion!
Not too long after, I find myself upstairs talking to Ralph on the big white telephone. I'm not quite sure how I managed to arrive in that situation, but I was in the bathroom for the rest of the night. If my memory serves me correctly, I recall my cousin coming to tell me they were leaving and then the next her coming in to say that they had returned. I figured either a) it sucked with out me or b) I was dunzo like over-cooked quiche. I'd like to say that the first of the two is the obvious answer, alas the latter takes the prize.
I woke up in my cousin's room, as I vaguely recall changing into some clothes she handed me, at 7:21 in the morning. At this God aweful time? Well my sister was picking my shameless self up at 7:30 to drive to Muskoka. I managed to keep the car clean, but we did have to pull over on the way home. And the drive up north is a little unknown. I was unconcious on the back seat. Until 12, when my dad came to drag my ass out of the car for breakfast.
All I ate that day was muffins.
And as I changed into my bathingsuit I found a five dollar bill in my bra. I was surprised about that.
And then proceeded to go tubeing.
I'm pretty sure that I was still hungover monday morning at work.
It was exciting and the smell of orange makes my stomach turn.
If only I had been able to dance....